Life in Transition (Edition 3): 2020 and Gratitude
At the very least, the year 2020 has been a massive curve ball for us all. And, as the pandemic continues globally with only the hint (and hope) of an end in sight, one good thing that this time has made us do is reflect. Reflection can at times be painful, because it may make use think about things that we were previously choosing to not be aware of. However painful, reflection can be helpful for us to move forward and progress into a better version of ourselves in hopes of a better tomorrow.
Sometimes it's hard for us to see any good that has come from this pandemic, because it is mostly downright terrible. I don’t need to remind anyone - including myself - of all of the horrible, sobering events that have occurred over the last several months and likely to keep occurring over the foreseeable future. Trying to know about all of the heartbreaking events that are happening in the world everyday feels impossible and probably is very taxing on us mentally.
But, I don’t want to talk about those things here, although very important and should not be forgotten. Let’s leave the doom and gloom for another moment of reflection. I want to discuss something that has come from the pandemic that I believe to be beneficial for our well-beings. I hope to take it with me after the pandemic is long over. It might be helpful for others, as well.
This positive aspect (and it might be the only one) is that my appreciation for and mentality towards gratitude has changed.
I am realizing more and more just how much I took for granted prior to the pandemic, quite simply because I felt that certain things would always be at my disposal subconsciously. Some of these things include going to get cocktails with friends inside a bar, walking through busy public spaces, or sitting right next to a stranger on the subway.
It’s been a terribly hard process coming to terms with the fact that I can’t do many of the things that I really enjoy that I was once able to. I can’t go to gallery openings, go to cafes to get some work done, or even smile at strangers on the street because the mask is blocking my face. On a bigger scale, I can’t travel to the places that I had planned like advocating for the arts in Washington D.C. for Arts Advocacy Day.
As human beings, it is natural for us to fixate on the negative things that happen to us and glide over the positive things. This is a psychological mentality that we have developed in terms of survival so we don’t make the same mistakes that could hurt us again in the future. However, it is vital for us to try to shift this mentality in some ways.
Although it may be frustrating when we think about all the things that we want to do but can’t, there are things that I have done to resist these feelings of frustration. These measures have made it easier for me to cope through this odd time. If you would like, you can take these steps too.
The key is to change your perception around the things that you are able to do. The fact of the matter is that we are still able to do a lot of things! We can have a picnic at the park or expand our minds through learning something new. One of the things that I have implemented in my own life is the use of a gratitude journal. This tool has benefits on your life even when not during a global pandemic.
Using a gratitude journal is really simple. Once or twice a day (or whenever you want) set aside a few minutes to write down a list of a few things that you are grateful for. These could be good things that happened during the day or things that you are grateful for in your life. Some of the things I have written in my own journal range from the impact that meditation has had on my life to how refreshing a gin and tonic can be on a summer day. These things that we list don’t have to be life altering, they can simply be things that help us feel fulfillment.
By becoming more aware of the things that we are grateful for or the positive things that have happened to us, we no longer focus on the negatives. This is an essential mentality shift and you will start to see its impact on other parts of your life.
By choosing to focus on these positive aspects of life, it has made me more aware and present in this moment. I am a futuristic thinker by nature, which is very common for people here in the United States due to certain societal values that we hold, and I don’t think I would have taken the time to change my mentalities had this year not occurred in the way that it had.
The pandemic has forced everyone to slow down. To take account of all the things we are temporarily unable to do that we once took for granted and all the things that we are still able to do on a daily basis. This is because many of us find a lot of joy from interacting with others; meeting new people and getting to know others in close proximity to one another. For a little while, we shouldn’t take part in these activities even though we may be tired of being vigilant about the pandemic.
I am more aware of the things that make me feel fulfilled and I allow those things to have more weight in my mind whereas before I would have moments of gratitude but not reflect upon them. As a result, I would fixate on the negative things in my life and breeze right past the good things.
In the not so distant future, when things will return to “normal” (or a new normal), I will take the outlooks that I have gained during this time and carry them into my new life. Although things may feel bleak when we choose to make ourselves aware of all the global suffering that is going on, it is imperative for us to learn about the things that we are grateful for in our own lives so we don’t become paralyzed with all of the terrible things happening around us. By becoming more grateful we can then help ourselves so we can help those who are suffering later on. Fill your own cup first so you can help fill someone else’s cup in a more helpful way in the future. And, hey, if there are things that make you fulfilled that you are mindful of then you know that others can find similar fulfillment in their own lives.
Altruistic benefits of gratitude aside, maintaining a greater sense of gratitude will make you feel more fulfilled and content with your daily life. You will no longer get hung up on finding happiness in the future because you have fantasies of travelling the world or gaining more financial security. You will find more happiness in the right here and now. By doing things that you may have considered mundane before. Like for me, writing this piece is bringing me joy because I am completely here in the present with it. Just being aware of the fact that I have become more grateful in the present brings me a sense of bliss. It is never possible to have only blissful moments, but becoming more grateful will make the blissful moments that we do have to be louder and the negative ones to have less weight.
I hope changing your perception of the moments in your life and becoming more grateful brings you some fulfillment, as well.
